Mistaken Identities

Looking in the mirror, not seeing my face,
Just a mask no flesh in the reflecting space,
Must I have to take it off to lace together who I am?
Trust the person in front of me to take control?
Yes, I have to or I'll have to pay a endless toll,
Peeling the plastic back like a disgusting scab,
Dab your feet in the waters of falseness won't make you a facade,
Stab the masks who aren't you otherwise you will find you are a fraud,
As people we all have our hidden agendas and mistaken identities,
But why? The insecurity has left us shaken with the fear,
Fear of being revealed for who we really are,
Far from truth running around looking for some answers,
Last time I checked I wasn't democratic or republican,
I was actually none of them, just living amongst the silent majority,
Making my day and getting paid, Sliding by on minimum wage,
When the only thing I knew about myself was my age,
Left alone on this stage creeping with critics,
Afraid of revealing the scar that lies beneath the plastic, the skin,
We should be hated for our vomit we spew all over each other, the sin,
that has fermented our nature since the beginning,
We are the very nightmares we create,
Ironic, we see our own fate behind our eyes,
Every vampire, werewolf, zombie. It's us, that lies beneath that mask,
Just as revolting as the obscene creatures we make, pass the flask,
And celebrate our distorted past that takes way from the real task at hand,
We have to stand together to destroy the evil that plagues the world,
Throw down our mistaken identities and our hidden agendas,
And give it to a savior, who stitches and mends us together.

Hotter Side of the Back Burner

Wanting things to be different from where they are now,
Ignoring the "stop" & "do not enter" signs,
Tolerating & always reading in between the lines,
Trying not to focus on the shadow that is always following me, just like you did,
The thing that haunts me is not the pain but you,
Not the circumstances or reasons, Not the times or seasons,
I just loved you for who you were, a treason that isn't easy broken,
Your skin was a habit, a drug that has the worst side effects,
But it seems to me that I am receiving the hotter side of the back burner,
Getting the short side of a long stick,
Until I was burnt to a crisp & falling off a cliff.
Something slithered in my veins when this happened,
Not the emotion of betrayal not even anger, just amazement,
As harsh as your words are, I stood back surprised that you took it that far.
I don't know where you went but I'm seeing the lines again,
No signs, No restrictions, No looking back,
I'll turn the tides.

In the Claws of the Enemy

I search for the words to find, but they never came,
I try to fix the past, but things couldn't stay the same.
This town has been burned to the ground,
Where everything makes a sound of fear,
Peoples voices fill the air like the missiles that came at me from every direction,
Even the night isn't still, sleeping isn't a option,
Having to keep the will to survive in this world full of demons,
In the corner of my mind, confiding in doubts & regrets,
barricading, waiting for a savior to rescue me from the war,
grey clouds spread across the horizon like a vast ocean, the sun not even flickering
I've been injured and tortured by the enemy, wolves rip my skin like paper,
The agony beckoned the thought of death, the thought of losing.
Choosing my own fate, I go after the enemy with my heavy heart.
Rage wild-fired within me, consuming my persecutors as they were dust,
The sky now looked like red smoke, Oblivion was rupturing,
As all hell broke loose and the rapture was the only thing peering through the amber shaded sky,
I swung my arm at a demon's face, hooking it clean in the jaw as the blood flooded from its mouth,
eyes shot to me suddenly, unnerved to the pain, the demon howled like the wolves from earlier, back arched over as it tackled me to the ground,
managing to grab the rock next to me I plod it into one of its eyes,
earnestly in pain now it yelps and more of them come,
I stood back on my feet as they circled around me, taunting me,
Fist cringing at the sight of them all,
One jumps at me as I reacted to uppercut it in the throat, it gagged itself to death as the blood streamed forcefully out its nose and eyes,
They just keep coming now and I finally surrender in the claws of the enemy.
As a chandler of light gleams through the gloomy red clouds,
The beam of light zooms at the arm of the demon that's holding me, which instantly burns to ashes,
Freed from the clutches of the creature I find myself running,
Trying to get away but their speed is increasing, and energy unhindered,
the light then glimmers through the clouds as it lifts me up like a tractor beam,
I get engulfed by the clouds which I still reside, because when I look down all I see is demons crawling around like insects feeding on everyone & everything,
The light is my savior, I'll follow it through every door it takes me.

Lost in your Lips

Kissed you so hard, I lost every breath of mine,
I was blind to the truth, and thought everything was fine,
Hugged you so hard, I blinked then lost you the very next second,
So close to my heart it pierced a hole that is nonrefillable,
A complete eye sore you are, Like a cavity that won't ever go away,
And even though you're away it punctured my skin so badly, That you are in my skin, a sliver.
Your words are like needles injecting into my fragile heart,
Kissed you so tenderly, I got lost in your lips,
Hugged you so softly, I got lost in your arms,
My world flips when I don't have you around,
The harms of life never caused me strife until I lost you,
But life moves on and tonight, I miss you more than any moan can ever express,
Stayed by the phone like a sick man waiting for the cure,
Laid down crying rivers for you, Fell in and floated down stream,
Off a waterfall and into the rapids of despair and loss.
I was caught in the undertow and dragged down out to sea,
Sank to the bottom like a ton of bricks,
As the sunshine slowly disappeared from my face,
And the darkness was the space I stupidly dug myself into,
The space up top was nice and you were looking down on me in pity,
I would part the sea to get to where you are but you are far away from wanting that,
You dipped your feet in then ran away, annoyed and afraid,
As I laid searching for your eyes in the clams' pearls, But I tried in vain,
Looked for your smile under each rock, while it slowly drove me insane.
I held my breath counted to three,
To hear the words that get me every time,
All I wanted to hear was that you loved me.
It was ran through my veins like a poison from the most toxic jellyfish,
Stinging every inch of my body, Until my corpse lied underneath a pile of seaweed,
Then I bleed until it scars as it develops into a tough callous,
I must find fortitude.
Tonight I am above you looking down,
Tonight I am free from your watery grave you made for me,
Tonight the fight is mine as you can see and I am not your slave,
I have the heart in my chest that I so foolishly gave.

Behind A Windshield

Looking out and receiving no encounter,
The room shook inside until the walls slowly crumbled,
I stumbled on the thought of loosing you,
Like a vivid nightmare where the killer is always me, & there is nothing I can do.
I stared at the ceiling to pass time which only brought the tears to my eyes,
Because when I looked in your eyes they were inviting like home with doors open wide,
Found shelter behind your eyes until I was hopeless like a child in a house full of ghosts,
The walls came alive which swallowed me up, While I gazed out the window to find you,
The hosts in the house were only strangers to me, pretended to be my friend then stabbed my heart in the end,
Bridges can't mend if they are already burned to the ground,
So you turned your back and hung me upside down drowning in my tears,
Set me on fire then fed the flames with the fears of loosing you,
I stayed by your side and held your hand, which is now incinerated, Like all the love I had for you,
Up in flames, Looking outside,
You were inside and you left me in my own bloody mess,
Expecting me to clean the situation and sweep my heart away with all the rags of the past,
You left so fast you didn't even showed me you cared,
Just stared out the window like a crooked toothed madman with a yellow smirk on your face,
Yep you sure fooled me in the first place, What a clever one you are...
Leading me to a trap that decided my own fate, I took the bait,
While you tore every limb off then unloaded the machine gun to my chest,
I gave you my best, you left me the worst feeling,
And as I was bleeding profusely from every angle, I told you: "I love you" with a sincere smile,
Asked you if you wanted to stay a while,
Then at that moment you shot me in the head, Brains scattered like glass on the stained red grass,
Leaving me dead.

Seasons went by like days and my body slowly decayed at each rise and fall of the sun;

As my body laid there like a chopped down tree, my skin was the leaves which were falling off,
Revealing my organs and the rest of my insides that still remained,
I was still left with my sincere smile as my pink lips faded to a ghostly pale color,

The snow fell, which transformed into leaves, which transitioned to tears upon my face like the rain that descends often, But there's nothing left to do.
And now my mission is done I did all I could do,
My heart was the only thing that stayed never deceasing to stop pumping for you,

Thump! Thump! Thump!

Jumping off the ground like a bunny with springs under each foot,
Galloping at a speed of a billion horses, waiting, wishing,
For the girl I love the most to look out the window and come out,
Behind a windshield, will you stay there?
Or do you care for me? Then stay a while and talk with me....
With my dying breath I say: "I love you" again with a sincere smile.

Closer (Preface)

CreeeAAK! -Bam!
-The door slams in the darkness as the figure peers through the shadows. Its heart is slowed after a long days work and is shedding its drenched coat, it sluggishly makes its way to the couch while dropping its belongings relentlessly. The couch is occupied by the cat but reacts and flees from being sat on retreating to the rug next the fireplace. Then what appeared to be a person slips onto the couch with a heavy sigh and effortlessly clicks on the television which is two feet from his face. His features come into the television's light; this broad shouldered, thick jawed, giant standing at roughly 6' 3", his eyes were icy blue with a sloped nose and rough around every edge. His name is Ezekiel and the face everyone knows: the stereotypical average blond haired, blue eyed American with a job but feels like he isn't ready to raise a family, besides he's only 22 years old. Ezekiel's vision is on the T.V. but his head is bobbing & thumping against the armrest in restlessness. And while his eyes shut to the light as his roommate enters the room almost silently except the quiet humming; it sounded like Mozart. Ezekiel hears him humming but isn't alarmed he figured it was him then drifted back into a hard slumber, this time he was snoring louder than his roommates humming. His roommate unnervingly finds his way to the bedroom where both of their beds were located, just at the end of the dark hallway. Ezekiel's roommate eased his way to the room then went to bed. Almost appearing to wait for someone.

Crossroads of Eternity

It's been happening since the beginning.
Once we were innocent & shameless,
Then went into he world,
The darkness was unknown and the ugly monsters never showed their faces,
Until now the darkness flowed around us like a flood,
the blood gushes from the festering wounds.
It swept our feet from underneath us while our demons dragged us down,
We have to learn to drown them.
Their stare burns with a hateful passion that stings like a thousand bees to my soul,
Their faces chard black with the flesh peeling back.
They're raiding our homes, Grinding our bones.
Murdering & torturing,
Anguish appearing across all the victims,
We were captives, prisoners of war,
Controlled like a machine, programmed to not let our heart soar.
They tore my dreams to pieces,
As we escaped through the seams of reality,
Because reality is-nothing is as it seems,
Everything you see will collapse and shatter,
So is this reality, No I don't believe so,
It's just the crossroads of eternity.

The Daily Grind

We’ve all been here before,

The door is closed to the things that are bad to us,

Let this be a example,

I took the first bus away from my broken heart that was trampled on,

Never realizing I was going away from a part of me.

The door is the daily grind of life,

Everything that causes strife enough to close our doors,

The wound that turned to a sore,

And every sore it callouses and hardens,

Against all the things that draw you back.

The sack of burdens you drag, as every day goes by.

All those shores of the past, that left you going away with a cast,

All those people you label as an outcast.

It cripples our creativity,

And grows our negativity instead, Like pale skin across a dead man.

We kick the can and move on, Waiting for a clan that fits our description,

But in the end wearing a mask, Finding a task,

Like a certain seashell on a empty beach,

When we find one that doesn’t fit the one we want,

We throw it away with a nonchalant embrace, Without a trace.

Then when we pick up the “right one”,

We close the doors to all the other ones.

Because the daily grind, is the only shells we find.

We are looking for the norm not the storms that make life shake,

We have to break the door in order to open our minds,

And open up the blinds of your house to let it all in,

Then we might find something, If we sleuth the pursuit of-

What isn’t the daily grind.
The truth isn't the daily grind.

The Last Poem

Right now I'm confused & heartbroken to the truth,
It's such a shame that we ended up this way,
I can't tell which direction is
up, down, left, right. I look but there is no sight of you,
No girl ever took my heart galaxies away, like a rocket ship,
Launching every time when we kiss,
But this time it was a failure to launch and my heart was the only casualty.

It was no accident, you shot me down and burned the ashes,
Once you burned the ashes you drowned each one until evaporating into nothing,
The outcome was catastrophic, as you turned and walked away,
I tried everything to make you stay but you condemned it, Like a expired appalling fruit.

If this is the last poem I will write to you,
I want you to know I forgive you, And no matter what you do,
I'm here for you.
This is for you not for anyone else,
Because the times we shared were great,
And if I could be straight with you,
Know that if I had three wishes they would be for you to come back,
But for once words are not enough to convince you,
So I love you even though you made my world black & white,
Decembers will never be the same, They will be grayer than usual,
And October will always be darker, the moonlight will never be bright enough.

I thought I was tough but the heart in my chest seems to be as brittle as glass,
In this situation, I don't know if the glass is half empty or half full,
I'm looking at it from the top but the future is appearing dull.
If you don't want to stay a while,
I won't put you through a trial, (even though I can tell your in denial)
So even though I'd travel every miles in the ocean to get to you,
And it's hard to see the light, and chances are I won't;
But I love you despite my thoughts and the circumstances.

Hip Like A Hypocrite

Today, Heroes are hard to find,
You can't find them in a cereal box anymore,
They are all people who have a closed door to a open world,
In my eyes, I mostly see the stuck-ups who are deaf & blind,
But that's not what defines a hero.
They are trendy but yet unhappy,
Looking for a hero and some sense of life,
Celebrities mixed with the rich & famous,
Fear mixed with greed & insecurity.
In the end, Their all hip like a hypocrite,
Always trying so hard to fit in,
Searching for hope & importance like diamonds in a world full of bronze,
They're climbing the corporate ladder with desperation for success,
While slowly being revealed it's going no where,
Like a merry-go-round, A constant cycle.
The corporate ladder is a full hive of toe jam,
Ironically rotting in a hell of their own making, fueled by motives of self-medication.
Trading their hearts for satisfaction but really getting nothing in the end, Fooled to believe the lie.
Climbing the ladder of success:
Looking down & crashing to the ground like a thousand plates-

CRASH!

The cement cracking their craniums & hearts until the pulse is at a stall,
Climbing the ladder of success, and finding out that this is all?
Their hip like a hypocrite,
And yes, the chip on their shoulders are self-pity,
Going through the world without a purpose,
It seems to me that their lives are less than worthless,
They get their satisfaction then leave with a bitter taste,
Amazing how their talents turned out to be such a waste,
I believe they're not helpless though,
There has to be a way to show.

Ex's & Oh's

We all make mistakes, it's something that is familiar to us all,
We fall then pick ourselves back up with some sense of benefit of doing so,
But in the end you may not get what you want,
Because a voice is screaming: "No!" like trumpets blasting in your head,
Instead of living life for yourself, do it for others because in the end your going to whined up dead.
Life's full of ex's & oh's, and fingers will demand results,
It can be dull & cruel sometimes, humbling bring you to knees in despair,
There is good in the world but it's not detectable by sense.
We can't taste contentment, food's flavor never lasts long enough,
Our ears can't hear perfection, the notes are always bent,
Each finger will never touch the skin of grace,
And eyes can't picture the amazing face of righteous,
We are all tools of something beyond us.

Vurnerablility & The Child

We have to be children,
No matter where we are or where we've been,
Careless and blameless with no sight of sin.
Open to when we're not just okay,
Not a facade at the end of the day,
Vulnerable to the world,
Not cynics in this battlefield.
Or sealed to our own fate,
But if we bust the gate and find a way,
And say what's on our hearts and not whats on our mind,
We may find a child who is shivering from the loneliness,
And suffocating from a lack of understanding.
Why are we so focused on invulnerability? The strongest?
'Cause no one here is better than the rest, there is only one best,
So why do we pretend and make it's something that it's not,
Was it structure and organization that caused our downfall?
It made our imaginations sink like a rock in the sea,
Our scars calloused and construct demons that control who we are,
We wear masks to disguise who is really inside,
And who is that face?
A child slowly growing paler and slipping away.
So close your eyes and slip into your happy existence,
And let your ignorance and anguish keep you warm,
Bless the people that mourn, but it's so foreign.
Count your fortune and stay content, Under circumstances,
And mount your hope and dreams on this one life,
Then be disappointed because this isn't real life,
Strive to become the best, And hope.
Like a dog hopes for it's owner to throw a stick,
Prepare then be disappointed.
Be content and unprepared, Like a child,
And you will see that the world isn't at all what it seems.
Through the eyes of a child.

Running Through a Mine Field

Have you been uncertain where you stand?
You feel like an immigrant in an unknown land,

Lost, and slipping into the quicksand,

Screaming but it doesn't seem to make a sound,

And every mistake you made keeps you bound.

You feel like your running through a mine field,

Never knowing if the very ground will sustain the explosion,

And when will the pain stop and if your voice will hold out.

Putting my love on a shelf or ripping off each one of my limbs,

Which one is worse?

With my heart on the line, I gave you my last breath,

But you thought of only yourself, Without a sign of hope.

So instead put a rope around my neck and choke me until I shout,

Tell me what this life is about anyways, Because when I look around,

I see a war-torn city with bombs sounding off, one by one,

As the smoke rises with the sun black is all I see, even when the day just begun.

Everyday I feel like like I'm running through a mine field,

Scrambling to survive another night,

Not knowing where I'm headed or where to turn,

But I swear I found something that is worth the fight,

And everyday I learn more and more.

With that knowledge I find the door of escape is one step closer,

I found-

I'm just a musician not the composer of a perfect melody,

I'm a puzzle piece of a much bigger picture, But I came from a nobody.

And You made me something, Not a person adding stricture to this confused reality,

Because You chose life for me instead of being another fatality.

You filled that void, the wasteland that infected my restless soul,

And surged Your life through mine like a million volts,

You revived me when my pulse was dull.

Now everything is fine.

Competition of Voices

Raining sweat out of each pore,
Lightning storms flash in my mind,
Like flashbang grenades from the past.
Blinding & bring tears flowing from each eye,
I can't see the sky, It all blurred and my fears cloud them.
Sometimes I feel like a amature in a room of professionals,
Everyones so loud and overwhelming at times,
We are in a competition of voices, In a enormous crowd,
But it is the choices we make that set us apart.
So start to make a gash in the world or just leave a small scratch,
No ones better than anyone else no matter how well you match up to peoples' expections,
Don't burn your relations with your loved ones for a place of security.
'Cause in the end friends are all there are.

Would you be satisfied if armagedon happened right now?

Shorthanded Love

Vengance motivated by a obscure past,
With repentance that will never last.
You confided in your fears & doubts,
As you spoon-feed me your shorthanded love,
Giving me a push & a shove,
Ranting & Raving over my incompedence,
Wanting independence,
While remenents of my heart lies in the wake of destruction.
There is a obstruction it's clotting each vein like plugs in a sink.
Until the beating slows to the pace of a slug. I can't think.
So I ripped my infested heart covered with maggots from the past, Dug a endless hole.

Buried it underneath a infinite amount of dirt and rocks,
Populated by the shorthanded venom, Sufficating from the hurt.

I left it alone....Just like you left me alone.

Your kisses engrave my mind,
Inducing a intoxicating headache, Without a medication.

Your still here or are you, I can't tell if its real or fake.

But it doesn't matter, you'd rather doubt than trust,
So leave if you must, With grace like a dove,
But I will never forget your shorthanded love.
Swimming in a sea of bitterness & hate,
When I found me washed ashore.

Trying to find the heart I misplaced.

Where did I put it?
The words traced through my mind like a pencil.

Disoriented from the chaos in my brain,
A blurred image peers through the black, like I was just reborn,
It's my heart's grave, I sworn to myself.
Shovling the dirt & rocks away that remained like the ancient scars of yesterday,
I sweep the reminding rubble away, with my hand which are wounded and swollen,
But my heart wasn't there! I have to get back what you stolen.

Crossroads of Eternity

It's been happening since the beginning.
Once we were innocent & shameless,
Then went into he world,
The darkness was unknown and the ugly monsters never showed their faces,
Until now the darkness flowed around us like a flood,
the blood gushes from the festering wounds.
It swept our feet from underneath us while our demons dragged us down,
We have to learn to drown them.
Their stare burns with a hateful passion that stings like a thousand bees to my soul,
Their faces chard black with the flesh peeling back.
They're raiding our homes, Grinding our bones.
Murdering & torturing,
Anguish appearing across all the victims,
We were captives, prisoners of war,
Controlled like a machine, programmed to not let our heart soar.
They tore my dreams to pieces,
As we escaped through the seams of reality,
Because reality is-nothing is as it seems,
Everything you see will collapse and shatter,
So is this reality, No I don't believe so,
It's just the crossroads of eternity.