My Mind Is A Prison

I'm angry
I thought it was at her but really it's at my self
Her glamorous image carved into my head
Cursed to remember the day I fell into love
The day I fell into hate.
A truly unforgiving fate
that I am destined to walk alone.
 A trail of shed tears and broken memories
I thought that she would see through my imperfections and love me for me
But I was wrong I can remember everything about her from the curls in her hair too the dimples on her cheeks.
You see I connected too her but not the other way around,
 a broken connection if you will. And now I am damaged,
cast away to a misfit island to live in solitude I feel so cold,
 I feel so lonely. I close my wretched eyes to only be cursed to see her flawless smile.
She is my Medusa, I stand still as stone when she sets her gaze upon mine. she will never be mine.
Sadly she is with somebody else, sadly she is in someone else's arms and I can not stand it.
I am an addict its tragic and she is my drug.
She is my air and I can not breath with out her.
She was the one person I was destined to spend my life with.
But things change.
I sink into the blackness of the ocean floor,
her light dims as I descend into darkness. I see a dim image of her slowly dancing with someone else, and she subtly glances at my way never to see me again.
A grin of contempt stretches across her face as she rests her head on another's shoulder.

 But...

 My mind is a prison,
With no windows or doors in my vision,
Just dingy bricks and mortar, And I etch days out with a rock or anything I can get my hands on,
The warm touch of the sun I long for as well as the wind, I just desire for this to end.
 These dreams of the outside torture me, But nothing like her departure from me.
 But at least I'm safe inside my mind,
And the memories I make are mine not shared and branded on my skin, infecting my flesh like twisted sin,
Better than being taken captive by love, Solitary confinement is more than enough, To play keep away from everyone,
As years progress from the months.

Perhaps I have adapted to loving my own mind-induced prison,
My slice of paradise where its just me and my mirage apparitions.
 All I have is the words chipped out of these walls, no one to step on me, enthrall me then maul my heart like a hungry bear,
No one to compare me, or say they don't care,
Just me and my fortress of barbed wire brick walled protection,
No more feeble feelings just my sad cracked reflection.